It could be seen as a loaded question, a trap set to catch Will in a lie or an inconsistency, but Will can hear the pain cached within it, the part of Hannibal that cares for Will as a friend, as a partner and a lover, the part that wants Will by his side at least for the foreseeable future if not always. It's the rarely seen vulnerability, the desire to be seen and understood and, yes, loved, that had made Will agree to go with him tonight, that had broken the last fraying threads of Will's loyalty to Jack, the FBI, and his entire life before Hannibal.
Hannibal deserves the truth, and Will has no intention of keeping it from him.
"My motivations at the start were fueled by reciprocation," Will says. "You'd seen me locked away, my freedom taken from me, my credibility put into question." It's a simple way to put all the feelings Will had cultivated in prison, the anger, the betrayal, the frustration at being disbelieved by everyone. By the time he'd been released, despite knowing it had been Hannibal who'd allowed it to happen, all Will could understand was his desire for revenge.
"I was dedicated to the role," Will goes on, meeting Hannibal's eyes fully. "But, as I said before, the longer it went on, the less of what I said was exaggeration. When we spoke in your office, I was myself. The more of you I saw..." Will trails off, taking a breath. "The more I saw myself in you."
He takes another moment, his eyes on Hannibal's, watching and unafraid. He's already made his choice, and he won't change his mind. The only way he won't be on that midnight plane to Paris is if Hannibal leaves him behind, dead or alive.
"Three days ago I knew exactly what I was going to do. Two days ago I started to question my decision. Today, in your office, I had no idea who's side I would go to when the time came. Tonight, at your table, I could only see myself helping you murder Jack." He sucks a breath through his nose, and when he speaks again, his voice is low, barely a whisper.
"My motivations tonight came from wanting you, to be with you."
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Hannibal deserves the truth, and Will has no intention of keeping it from him.
"My motivations at the start were fueled by reciprocation," Will says. "You'd seen me locked away, my freedom taken from me, my credibility put into question." It's a simple way to put all the feelings Will had cultivated in prison, the anger, the betrayal, the frustration at being disbelieved by everyone. By the time he'd been released, despite knowing it had been Hannibal who'd allowed it to happen, all Will could understand was his desire for revenge.
"I was dedicated to the role," Will goes on, meeting Hannibal's eyes fully. "But, as I said before, the longer it went on, the less of what I said was exaggeration. When we spoke in your office, I was myself. The more of you I saw..." Will trails off, taking a breath. "The more I saw myself in you."
He takes another moment, his eyes on Hannibal's, watching and unafraid. He's already made his choice, and he won't change his mind. The only way he won't be on that midnight plane to Paris is if Hannibal leaves him behind, dead or alive.
"Three days ago I knew exactly what I was going to do. Two days ago I started to question my decision. Today, in your office, I had no idea who's side I would go to when the time came. Tonight, at your table, I could only see myself helping you murder Jack." He sucks a breath through his nose, and when he speaks again, his voice is low, barely a whisper.
"My motivations tonight came from wanting you, to be with you."